Yep, here I am again. And yes, I know that I seem to be making a habit of saying that.
Another day at the office and another step towards total world domination through the convoluted yet deceptively simple device of crosswords. The scum won't even know what hit them and soon I shall have every single person hooked on to them, and shall then commence to manipulate their will to my bidding. Huuaaa haaa haaa haa(that's my evil world domination plan laugh by the by).
Yes, it is obvious that I haven't much to do isn't it? I suppose this is a rather damaging sin to confess to, considering that prospective employers prowl the net looking for the slightest evidence of neglect and slacking down. Sigh. I'll never be employed again.
As life chugs on, emitting the occasional grunt and clicking its claws at passersby, I fail to understand the logic behind it all. What's the point? Please note how bravely I have so far kept off the "Why are we here" topic that seems to have no dearth of takers in the market.
However, that, for me is an open and shut case (simple decision according to the crossy). Here's what happened... pay close attention now, this concerns the holy as well as the unholy dead who preceded us and left this bag of **** for us to handle on a daily basis.
Once upon a time, a long long time ago, there were a bunch of apes (not grapes mind you, though I do like those.. hmmm, long time no grape) who lived happily among their trees and a far greater variety of flora and fauna than present on Earth today.
Then one day, one ape hit a rock (purely symbolic, simply to denote a turning point in the story, he may as well have turned over in his sleep, though that hasnt the drama of hitting a painful rock) and his genes mutated. Note that all simplifications are for the good of fellow mankind, of whom I have a low opinion as far as the intellect polls go.
And the ape began to BE. Suddenly he was no longer just an ape. He was an Ape and he Knew. And He began his quest to discover what else He could Know and to learn what He Was. The more He Knew, the better equipped he was to lord over the apes and the more the gene mutated.
Soon, the apes were all gone and all that were left were the Apes. And these Apes soon realised that they could do without working, without swinging from trees and could quite well live in proper caves, thank you very much.
Thus began an era of decadence and invention which has never seen an end, even to this day, and the Apes have left their simple lives far far behind. They now live in a world where layer upon layer of artifice has been added to their days, to find them something to do, for them to feel needed and wanted and fulfilled.
And in all the world, with the technology and the advancement and the wars and the awards and money and power, not a single Ape survives that doesn't really wish simply to swing from the trees again and simple be an ape as all were meant to be.
Off to dream of my tree,
The Ed.
No comments:
Post a Comment